Pack up traveller

My body feels racked
So is the soul
So far experience of sail
Mostly raging ravaging storms
And me ill equipped
And rose tinted glasses
I wore
To gauge hues of horizon
Made me falter and fall
For times umpteen
There was weakness in heart
forever in love
Groomed in humility
To be unquestioningly let down
With all that was on fore
I was eager
So eager to please
I'd only self to debase
Take it all
With just a pinch of salt...
Now that I know
With reality revealed
I fear no more
I've handed the ores
To One who was there
tugging me with vestiges
of my vessel along
Through the worst of storm
He demonstrated His might
And i humbly witnessed
with heaving sighs
The One who was kind
Unconditional in love
Unseen and supreme
He landed me safe
On this interim shore -
It's now up to me
To rise from disgrace
Fill fuel set fire
And be ready
Be on sail
In directions uncharted
Its my leap of faith
That'll carry asail
My diminutive form
To where I was
Set out to go -
Be it sweet or gore
It just feels right
i am ready
to turn a page in my book
I've to move on

hey i thought
i was stumped out
clean bowl'd
before my innings
had come
to a natural close
........................
and then You
pulled the final string
to make me jump off
from pavilion - apathy
to pitch of applause
true to word
of Your Glory
and wondrous record
of bringing life to dead
cleaving herb out of seed
cultivating and growing
on not only the meadow
but even on stone
and with
miraculous style too!

which love?

in my experience
love in its ardence
is a chameleon
eager to possess
it can poison
change colour
back out with
turn of season
while true friendship
slumbers you warm
blesses, sates and endeavours
to bring
to life - the smell
colours and joy of spring

i want to start
this day
with statement
that tickled heart
at morn today -
thanks for making me
walk beside
with best of soul
of my time....
and then You sustained
kept 'em safe,
kept 'em well
only to make
all appear, surround
just when i needed
to know, feel
Your presence
through them.

i felt the power
of Your miracle wand
it moved with such ease and grace
and healed wound
that'd remained raw
unseen on surface.

the heart had been left
in deep freeze
for long years that merged
into decades
and when to defrost
i took hold
i withdrew
the ice was sharp
stung and bit, it bled
my core

समझो ना

सुन समझ रही थी
पर करने का  सामर्थेय नहीं थी
जूटा पा रही
कर्मपथ दुर्गम और जो उस पर
थी मुश्किल से संभल रही
तो कहाँ घूंट उतरती
स्वयं शक्ति से
वो जो सामने विराग विष का प्याला
रखा था यूं कि पुनर्जनम के वास्ते
मरने की शर्त लगी थी
- तो फिर समक्ष
समर्पण के सिवा
क्या राह बची थी?

सो मैं ने मन छोड़ा
और तुम ने झट  थाम लिया -
बस यही निदान था।

भोर

भोर हुई है
सूरज बस निकलने ही वाला है
बादलों का पट सीना चीर कर
अपनी भरपूर चमक लिए
धुप से धरती का ये सिरा
सहलाने गुदगुदाने -
पता है जो
यहाँ बड़ी देर तलक
तारीक शब का बसेरा था
उफ़ यहाँ कितना अँधेरा था।

my heart is boarded up
with a sign up
to say -
from today
all cowards with their cowardice
need find
another place to stay.

उपकार

तो आखिर दिखाई लीला
तुम ने जो मैंने
योगेणे चित्तस्य पदेना वाचां
के मन्त्र पढ़े
कुछ यूँ कि बिखरते बिखरते
निकल पड़ी हूँ
अपने सप्त चकरों के घन चक्कर से
और दर्शक बनी निहार रही हूँ
इस यकीं के साथ कि
वो मैं नहीं थी -
जब सहस्र सो चुका था
अज्ञ को भी थी नींद लगी
विशुद्दी को शुद्ध अशुद्ध की
कुछ थी पड़ी नहीं
अनाहत आहत पड़ा था
और बेचारा मणिपुर -
निर्धन अपनी शक्ति के मणि मोती लुटा
टुकुर टुकुर बस ताक रहा था
स्वाधिष्ठान और मूलाधार को
जो अनायास ही
तांडव कर चले थे
जो मुझे कदाचित
अब कबुल नहीं -

शुक्र गुजार हूँ।

inspiring words: yogena cittasya padena vacam
                           malam sarirasya ca vaidyakena
                           yopakarottam pravaram muninam
                           patanjali pranjalir anato'smi
                           Om shanti shanti shantihi

meaning: yoga purifies consciousness, language and speech
               the impurities of the body are removed with science of medicine
               these were given in the best of forms by my saint ('muni') - to whom i want to get close to
               patanjali to whom i pay respects to him with folded hands
               Om --- peace, peace and peace alone/
               

i'm home alone
again inundated with thoughts
that bother You so
i try
not to let seed
undo forming habit
its just that each one
as i remove
from heart's recess
heaves a long sigh -
it winces
along with me

just read your lines -
they said
you planned, created to lead
each to its goal
- where am i heading though
give me my light lest
in this darkness
as a blind
i'm led astray.

Awakening

It's ok
I heard You
speak thru deepak*-
it was gently said
between silent thoughts
that he was given
he was chosen
to be Upaguru
just for then
to reflect Your light
and let me see
self in clarity -
I am blessed
to be loved
and love
without belonging to any
other than Yea


I will heed
I'll free, not hold
I'll let him go too
but only for You.

Amen


* Deepak Chopra - meditations on love: 'loving your beloved'